Wedding bells ring in valley for same-sex couples

At least three same-sex marriage ceremonies took place in Modesto on Tuesday, the same day 11 gay and lesbian couples received marriage licenses from the Stanislaus County clerk's office.

It was the first day most California clerks issued the document, which extends legalized marriage to gay and lesbian couples. California is the second state, after Massachusetts, to marry same-sex couples, but it is the first that will grant licenses to couples from other states. Gay marriage is rejected by 45 states. New York, however, will honor California unions.

"It feels really good," Beth Holden, 27, said after she married Cynthia Soto, 48, Tuesday afternoon. The Modesto women have been together for 3½ years. They said they've been waiting to get married for three.

"Marriage makes a big difference," Soto said. "I cannot tell you what it is. I cannot put my finger on it. It's something intangible that marriage brings."

The couple became the Soto-Holdens at 12:30 p.m. when they were married at College Avenue Congregational Church.

The first reported ceremony in Modesto took place just before 10 a.m. in Graceada Park and was performed by the Rev. Grace Simons of the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Stanislaus County. Simons offered free ceremonies Tuesday to gay and lesbian couples.

A lesbian couple exchanged rings, vows and a kiss as several onlookers watched and then cheered. They declined to give their names.

By 4 p.m., 11 couples had received licenses, said Marv Hackett, assistant clerk-recorder at the Stanislaus County clerk's office. The day was free of protesters, he said.

"It's been pretty much business as usual," he said. "We don't really view it as anything different, just one of the services we provide to the community."

The license form is the same as in the past, with one exception: Instead of "Bride" and "Groom," applicants list "Party A" and "Party B."

The Merced County clerk issued five same-sex marriage licenses. Merced County Auditor-Clerk Stephen Jones had declared June 5 that his office no longer would perform weddings, citing space and resource constraints. The next day, he reversed the decision.

The San Joaquin County clerk's office issued 28 marriage licenses Tuesday, according to office supervisor Rosette Keopadubsy, but staff members were told not to track how many licenses went to same-sex couples.

'An exciting time'

Denise Judd, 47, and her partner, Cheryl Gehegan, 44, said they arrived at the Stanislaus County clerk's office as the office opened at 8 a.m. "on the nose." The couple have been together for 18 years.

When they arrived, they found "a line of friends and people we knew, very happy people," Judd said. "It's an exciting time for all of us."

The couple had a ceremony for friends and family in 1990 to recognize their union. In 2004, they registered as domestic partners in California.

"We've taken every step that there is to show how committed we are to one another," Judd said.

Gehegan said they plan to have a wedding in August, near the time of the anniversary from their 1990 ceremony.

"I want to make it easy on her," she said, smiling at Judd. "I don't want to give her too many dates to remember."

Other couples lingered in the clerk's office with smiles on their faces.

"Love is in the air," Jennifer Mercado, a legal clerk, told Soto and Holden about 8:30 a.m. "It's nice to see people who are so happy and in love."

Soto and Holden arrived at the clerk's office at 6 a.m. Holden took the day off from work. The women "acted silly" and took pictures of each other while waiting for the office to open at 8 a.m.

"We were the first ones to get a license," Soto said. "Mostly we came for a sense of community. We wanted very much to be married in Stanislaus County."

Holden said Tuesday morning that she still had last-minute chores before the ceremony, including picking up a turquoise and silver bracelet that had belonged to her grandmother and was handed down to Holden on her 16th birthday.

"I'm freaking out, I'm so excited," she said.

The couple said they weren't thinking much about the state campaign to deny same-sex couples the right to wed, which Californians will vote on in November.

"It's my wedding day," Holden said. "I'm thinking about, 'Am I going to pick up my flowers in time? Am I going to find my mascara?' "

Supporters attend weddings

Lewis Woodward, 79, and his wife, Shirley, 76, were among the roughly 40 supporters to attend the Soto-Holden wedding and a wedding that followed between Jay Wright and Mark Mitchell, also of Modesto. The Woodwards, who have a gay child, said they've hoped for gay marriage equality for a long time.

"In a few years, this will not be an event. Nobody will notice," Lewis Woodward said. "There are just so many big problems we should be working on. To be worrying about whether someone should get to marry someone they love, it's just silly."

Bee staff writer Emilie Raguso can be reached at eraguso@modbee.com or 578-2235.

This story was originally published June 18, 2008 at 4:45 AM with the headline "Wedding bells ring in valley for same-sex couples."