Carving up the turkey that is Obamacare

November 28, 2013 

The Lincoln Memorial was the site of a reading of Lincoln’s Thanksgiving declaration Thursday on its one hundred and fiftieth anniversary. The holiday is Abe’s concession to the South. It keeps some form of the Civil War going by having families get together every November.

President Obama asked families to promote Obamacare at Thanksgiving dinner. Not within reach of carving knives. Democrats will encourage nieces and nephews to enroll and Republicans will note that eighty million turkeys lost their health care plans this week.

Iran greeted its nuclear negotiator like a hero when he flew home from Geneva last weekend. It’s chilling. It’s not clear what we got out of the deal, but Obama bounded off his plane at L.A. Tuesday waving a deed to the Brooklyn Bridge dated six month from now.

Rolling Stone magazine profiled a California woman this month who announced that she will be marrying Charles Manson at his California state prison cell in January. He’s 80 years old and she’s only 25. The couple is planning an open-casket wedding.

Thanksgiving recalls the Plymouth Puritans inspired by John Calvin, John Milton and John Locke. However Virginia Anglicans were inspired by the religious royalism of Archbishop Richard Hooker. America was founded by a dispute between three johns and a hooker.

The White House held an online vote between two turkeys, Caramel and Popcorn, for President Obama’s pardon. The election’s loser was spared the axe and sent to a petting zoo. This administration never passes up the chance to make Darwin look like the bad guy.

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