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Colin Kaepernick (Turlock) turned 26 last Sunday. He'll be hard-pressed to top his previous year unless the 49ers bring home a Lombardi Trophy.
Kaepernick's birthday cake was covered in Sour Patch Kids, his favorite candy. Yes, he has a sour tooth.
Carolina's torrid Cam Newton comes to San Francisco on Sunday. If you think his arrival is connected to Aldon Smith's faster-than-expected return, you would be right.
Smith received five weeks of treatment after his second drunk driving charge. Is he sorry? For sure. Rehabbed? Doubt it.
The message from the 49ers: We care for Aldon Smith the man, but we care more about sacking Cam Newton.
More evidence on why Smith was rushed back into the lineup: The 49ers are 5-0 without Smith but have recorded only five sacks in the last four games.
The 49ers dread this scenario: Newton throwing touchdown passes to the revitalized ex-Niner Ted Ginn.
Only in the upside-down world of an NFL locker room does a bullied, abused and racially-harassed player become the bad guy.
The Dolphins tried to "toughen up" Jonathan Martin. Excuse me. He's started every Miami game since he was drafted in 2012 and, at Stanford, anchored the Cardinal's slug-in-the-mouth offense and protected Andrew Luck's blind side. Yeah, the first word that comes to mind is "soft."
Most of the Dolphins took Richie Incognito's side. Like we said, upside-down.
Everyone, from coach Joe Philbin to the trainer, must have been asleep at the wheel about Incognito a shameful chapter for the franchise that brought us Bob Griese, Dan Marino and Don Shula.
The tiebreaker, if there's one needed, on Incognito: His bio.
Think about it: Cal State Stanislaus soccer star Karenee Demery, the NCAA Division II Player of the Year. A case can be made.
Those Nike dollars haven't yet purchased a football national championship at Oregon, and Stanford still keeps getting in the way.
Oregon has totaled 34 points the last two years against Stanford. That's often a good half for the Ducks.
It's a new day at Stanford when the guy who saves the game with two recovered onside kicks is named Jeff Trojan!
Stanford retired John Elway's No. 7, only the third retired number on the Farm after Jim Plunkett's 16 and Ernie Nevers' 1.
As great as Elway was, his honor leans more toward lifetime achievement. He never played in a bowl game at Stanford.
The late Ray Willsey guided Cal football through the tumultuous 1960s. He coached much better than his record.
The Raiders are hard to beat when Terrelle Pryor sprints 93 yards for a touchdown. When he doesn't, well
The Eagles' Nick Foles, awake and wondering at 3 a.m.: I throw seven touchdown passes in one game, and I'm not immediately declared next week's starter?
Longtime basketball fans will notice a fascinating name on this season's Modesto Junior College roster: Blake Terry, the grandson of Claude Terry (Modesto High, Stanford, ABA, NBA).
Want to buy seats at soon-to-be demolished Candlestick Park? It will cost $650 for a pair.
Kaepernick has averaged only 167 passing yards per game since Week 2. No matter. Measuring his impact by numbers never has worked.
The best measuring stick for Kaepernick: Your eyes.
Bee staff writer Ron Agostini can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or (209) 578-2302. Follow Ron via Twitter, @modbeesports.