The times demand resilience. You continually confront unexpected obstacles. The recession foils your plans to negotiate a raise, promotion or new job. Your boss keeps reordering priorities, which changes the rules. You don't have to bounce back just once, but over and over.
"Knowing how to be resilient is the bottom line," says psychologist, executive coach and leadership educator Sylvia Lafair, president of Creative Energy Options Inc., in White Haven, Pa. If you aren't resilient, teach yourself.
The book "How To Hit a Curveball: Confront and Overcome the Unexpected in Business," by Scott Singer with Mark Levine (Portfolio, $24.95), uses baseball's nine innings to explain how to develop resilience. Singer maintains that "curve balls are typically the defining moments in the most successful lives ... (Your goal is) to hit those curve balls out of the park . . . ."
RELATEDNESS
Resilience isn't nurtured in isolation, but relatedness. The career of Tammy Brackett, owner of Moonstruck Promotions & Media in Richmond, Va., is a case in point. Brackett spent the early part performing as a singer/songwriter, guitarist and keyboardist. Knowing full well that this facet of her career would end, she prepared to recover and rebuild once it was over. She learned everything she could about her industry, publishing, copy writing and, finally, social media, "the way people were connecting," she says. "It was a constant learning process." In other words, she prepared for the inevitable break with what she'd been doing.
Brackett established continuity through her desire "to be of help to people in any capacity. That is always my main mission. Through that, I've established an incredible network of people. A lot of times they ask for advice. If I make helping them my main mission, it's odd how many of them will come back with a project to collaborate on." This enabled her to reposition herself in her career in her highly competitive industry. Subsequently, she broadened her work to other industries, including education and green.
Andrew Appel, creative director of Beyond Success Consulting L.L.C., in Woodbridge, N.J., is also other-focused. He promotes a blend of spirituality and materiality to people discouraged by current events. As he points out, hope is essential to resilience. He encourages people to "find a way to give to others rather than look for what you can get in all of your dealings and interactions. Try to give in an unconditional way over a period of time and then see what financial results your unconditional attention creates." He predicts "a shift."
Lafair would agree with the call to get outside of yourself and do something for others. She observed Katrina survivors and other people combat their very different obstacles by reinventing themselves. Lafair advocates "having people in your life so they can help you make adjustments as you act. Being resilient isn't being a superhero."
FOCUS
Focus, like relatedness, is also essential to resilience. It's "the cornerstone from which everything emerges," Appel says. "If you can't gain control of it, you can't be as effective."
Brackett concurs. "You really have to define what success is to you," she explains. "If you can, your focus will always be on track. For me, it's not having the most. It's needing the least. I don't need a fancy car or fancy office. I encourage people to write a success document, which begins with identifying what success means to them."
Lawrence Polsky, managing partner of PeopleNRG Inc., in Princeton, N.J., faced death, battled homelessness and encountered challenges in the workplace. He suggests a completely different method, "a selfish, emotionally-based motivator to keep you going, such as keeping your job, learning a new skill for a better job down the road or saving for your kids's education. There is nothing like personal interest to keep you motivated through any challenge at work."
What do these methods have in common? They're all about seizing on something that will keep you going when you need to bounce back.
Dr. Mildred L. Culp welcomes your questions at culp@workwise.net. Copyright 2010 Passage Media.
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