In spite of the constricted marketplace, it's almost as essential to know how to turn an employer or recruiter down as it is to job hunt.
Why? You need them in your network of contacts. You want to maintain a relationship with every (decent) hiring manager in your search, because another opportunity might come up or you might create another one there. This principle is true at any time, intensely true at this one.
Michelle Reitman, psychologist and founder of Cadenza Center for Psychotherapy and the Arts Inc., in Hollywood, Fla., works with a number of adults facing job loss. She observes increasing feelings of desperation as unemployment continues.
Reitman outlines five steps for a sensitive, effective turndown:
— Convey your appreciation for the offer.
— Let the person know you’ve made your decision after careful thought by "identifying positive attributes, such as industry, potential colleagues, salary, etc.," she says.
— Explain the specifics of your decision. These could be related to required tasks, the need to relocate or other professional or personal factors.
"State that you take commitments seriously and take pride in your work and reputation," she adds, "and for the reasons you've just enumerated, you think this isn't the right . . . (opportunity)."
— Conclude with openness rather than finality, she suggests: "Reiterate clearly that you’d like to be considered for other positions in the future and repeat how grateful you are for having been considered (for this one)."
In similar situations, Debra Benton, president of Benton Management Resources Inc., in Livermore, Colo., coaches executives and middle managers.
She considers it important to turn an offer down if it isn't suitable, because, if nothing else, it will make the employer want you more and, possibly, bend to get you.
She recalls a CEO in Southern California who told employees to keep their resumes current and interview whenever they had a chance. He wanted employees who, as she puts it, "were confident in their value and worth to an organization. Weak leaders want desperate subordinates." Good leaders don’t.
A potential employer will see your confidence and power in your ability to contribute and create value for an organization, which makes you appear to be a person with options. "It does make you more desirable," she believes.
Proceed with sincerity, though, or the employer might feel manipulated. While he might not necessarily renegotiate on the spot, he might well get back to you.
Although Reitman's method could easily be applied to recruiters, there are some special instructions, according to Tom Carter, president of New York City’s Leader/Finder Consulting Inc.
He's watched candidates reject offers under these circumstances: disagreement over compensation, multiple offers under consideration by the candidate and a counter from the current employer after accepting an offer from a client company. Carter says that lack of specificity in a turndown is a major mistake, particularly after what could be 12 to 20 interviews for one position. Unlike Reitman, he says that disappearing burns a bridge as much as failing to communicate reasons. However, a missed cue doesn’t signify that the bridge permanently went up in smoke, because you can always go back to provide personal and professional information in two weeks or so.
Carter maintains that a true professional will pick up the telephone and explain why he didn’t provide the full picture. Offering to discuss what transpired will help restore openness in the relationship. Then, when you meet, convey the missing specifics behind your inability and unwillingness to move forward with the opportunity, Carter recommends.
You’ll likely find that turning the page on the relationship is much more effective than closing the book.
Mildred L. Culp welcomes your questions at culp@workwise.net
©2009 Passage Media
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